I’m intrigued by personality typing. In my connections on Twitter I’ve come to learn of the Enneagram. I’m very much a novice, but I’m convinced after the bit of reading and listening to the Enneagram Journey podcast with a 9, that I’m a 9- a Peacemaker.
I also recently took a Myers-Briggs type personality test and came up as being an INFJ. Again, I’m a novice, but after doing some reading, there’s no doubt in my mind that I am this rare introverted, intuitive, judging, feeling personality that makes up only 1% of the population.
I think what draws me to take tests like this is my tendency to get lost in the intuitive connections I have with others. I start to wonder who I am, what I’m good at, what I like and what God is leading me to do. Even without personality tests, years of hindsight and feedback from my husband of nearly 25 years has helped me see that I am good with people, yet I’m introverted. I understand people and despise conflict. I will go along with just about anything unless it comes up against my convictions of what’s right and then I won’t move. The corrupted part of the personality I am makes me tend to be passive, disconnected, enabling, co-dependent and insecure. Enter Christ.
When I think back to how Christ has changed me if I compare myself to other people’s stories of coming out of sex, drugs and rock ‘n roll lifestyles (that I was taught growing up is what good Christians don’t do) I can’t see much change. Not that external patterns haven’t changed but for me the fruit of Christ in me is more seen when looking at how I relate to people. When I look at the heart of who I am, how pleasing people has controlled me, and how my self-preserving passivity was not piety at all but Pilot-like, I can say with great conviction, Christ has changed me utterly! Not that I’ve arrived. Far from it. I am still bearing the presence of an old self-worshiping nature. But the love of Christ has barged into my comfortable, self-preserving cell and filled me with courage by calling me his own. I am a peacemaker, but no longer for the upholding of myself. I am a peacemaker for the upholding of my King Jesus.
I’m still scared to death of conflict. I hate it. But now when I’m scared I hear his empowering voice calling me to speak in love, boldly, but humbly. I hear him empowering me to stand against evil, pushing it back with good. I see him open my hands letting the idols of human relationship fall so that I can love real humans who will surely cause me pain and take away my self-preserving comfort.
It is helpful for me to know that I am a 9 and a INFJ. Mostly because it helps me to see how Christ has taken one of his weakest, one of his most cowardly and is making me a confident conqueror, making peace by engaging and taking me out of my comfort-zone into relationships for his glory.
Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation. The old has passed away; behold, the new has come. 2 Corinthians 5:17